My Ticker

Tuesday, August 26, 2008

Weighty issues

I haven’t been able to even look at this blog, as I am not the MDBabyMaker right now. My Love’s job search is slow, and that slows down the baby making process. Or rather, we have stopped until she gets a job. After she gets a job, then it will be 3-6 months until we can start again. So no baby for me, and everyone around me is turning up pregnant.

So, in my free time, am I getting into shape and losing those pesky 10-20 pounds? Nope, just sitting on my butt trying not to get too much fatter. I put on a GOOD 10-15 pound while TTC, and each month I just kept hoping I’d be pregnant so I could blame the weight on that. Instead, I just need to blame my sugar addiction and near daily trips to Dunkin Donuts. I have cut back on some of my crap eating, but still have not gotten up the motivation to go to the gym. I really should do that now, so that when we are ready, I am in great shape. I even know that losing weight will help my fertility. Up until about two years ago (ages 30-31) I never really had to watch my weight. Now I do, and I am watching the scale go up and up. I am wearing a size that I never thought I would. And still, I am too lazy to get my butt to the gym. I am kind hoping that putting this out there will help externally motivate me. Goddess knows, I clearly have no internal motivation for exercise.

Today I am putting it out there. I will make a real effort to go to the gym 2 times a week in August and moving up to 3 times a week in September. I can go Wednesday and Friday of this week. Maybe this blog can be my losing weight blog until I have something else to focus on. I am not quite ready to tell the world my weight, but maybe I can talk about how much I am losing. I need a new focus, and sitting around being pissed at the universe is not helping anything but my ass expand. It is bad when your fat pants (which I have NEVER had to have) are getting tight, as well. I can’t afford more clothes, so I can think of my gym experience as saving money. Plus, I hate to shop and I have a ton of pants I cannot wear. Maybe if I lose some weight I won’t hate pants shopping because I’ll be able to wear a regular size and not the fat sizes. If I get my body in awesome shape, I’ll just have to get pregnant right away, right?

Here I go…


nutella said...

Goals are good. You can do anything, if you put your mind to it!

Lizzie said...

So sorry it's so tough. I totally get it. And I've never lost any weight during any of my breaks either. Hugs. And good luck with the gym motivation!

Lizzie said...

hey it's been a long time - just saying i'm thinking of you - wishing you well